I could not believe when I walked into my neighborhood CVS pharmacy and saw a barrel filled with airplane size bottles of Gallo wine right by the checkout. I was immediately drawn to the barrel and started digging through it like a kid searching for a special piece of candy in their Halloween bag.

I found a sample of all the varietals (5 to be exact) and I thought they were so cute (sad I know) that little bags of some of my favorite chips would be perfect to pair with the wine. So I got my 5 little bottles of wine and 5 little bags of assorted chips and headed home…I really did not do any drinking at CVS…

The list of wine: Pinot Grigio, Chardonnay, Merlot, Pink Moscato, and Moscato.

Pinot Grigio: Smell: lemon, lime, green apple Taste: green apple, pear, citrus finish

Chardonnay: Smell: pear, vanilla. I doubt this wine saw the inside of a barrel, but maybe some wood chips were thrown in the tank. Taste: creamy vanilla, apple pie and bread.

Merlot: Smell: tobacco, liquid smoke, dirt Taste: dusty black cherries, cedar, tobacco.

Pink Moscato: Smell: strawberry, cherry, honeysuckle Taste: strawberry, cherry pie, lime daiquiri.

Moscato: Smell: honey, lime, roses, honeysuckle Taste: Key lime pie, honey, orange.

The list of chips: Lay’s Potato Chips, Fritos, Cheetos (crunchy), Funyuns, Cool Ranch Doritos. I won’t go into the flavors of each chip because I’m sure a lot of you have consumed a bag or two before.

Now for the pairings in order:

Lay’s with Pinot Grigio: chips became tangy, but the oil from the chips was cleansed by the wine. Not bad.

Chardonnay: the wine added a butter aspect to the chip and tempered the saltiness. Really good.

Merlot: the wine gave the chips and smoky flavor. Really good

Pink Moscato: the wine made the chips a little sweet but it wasn’t that bad.

Moscato: the wine made the chips sweeter than the Pink Moscato did. It was ok.

Fritos with Pinot Grigio: the Fritos at first were tangy and then turned funky and earthy. Not good.

Chardonnay: the Fritos were more oil flavored than butter.It was ok.

Merlot: the wine tempered the oil and salt in the Fritos and gave them a smokey flavor. Good.

Pink Moscato: interesting sweet/salty with the Fritos and the acidic strawberry bite from the wine, cleansed the palate.

Moscato: the wine sweetened the Fritos. It was weird..

Cheetos with the Pinot Grigio: the wine made the Cheetos tangy and tempered the cheesyness.

Chardonnay: nothing changed. It was a good pairing.

Merlot: smokey cheese! YUM!

Pink Moscato: wine was refreshing and the Cheetos were not as salty.

Moscato: the sweetness of the wine covered up the Cheetos. Not good.

Funyuns with Pinot Grigio: the wine made the Funyuns taste like hushpuppies and tarter sauce. I swear!

Chardonnay: the added more butter and salt flavors to the Funyuns. It was good.

Merlot: Smokey onion rings! Awesome!

Pink Moscato: the Funyuns sort of tasted like caramelized onions because of the slightly sweet wine.

Moscato: just sweet and onions. Weird.

Cool Ranch Doritos with Pinot Grigio: the wine enhanced the tangy herbal aspect of the chips. Good.

Chardonnay: the chips became butter and spice. Interesting.

Merlot: the chips made the wine become harsh and lose it’s smokey fruit flavors. Not good.

Pink Moscato: there was a little sweetness but then a celery flavor emerged after eating the chips. Strange.

Moscato: the sweetness of the wine covered up the spices in the chip and left a weird sweet corn flavor.

The best overall pairing with the wines was the Lay’s Potato Chips but the most interesting was the Funyuns.

So there you have it Twisted Peeps! Now I need to brush my teeth and drink a gallon of water because of all the sodium I have ingested. Or maybe I should go back to CVS and get some blood pressure medicine…..

Cheers Y’all!